Wein-Cartoons VII

"I hope it's not another case of that product induced wine flu going around!"

"We have records of all the bad wines you bring to dinner parties."

"...and this is my wine from a previous marriage."

"Chemists love it. It goes very well with most food additives we use."

"I' shouldn't be surprised. Any restaurant that serves Tufurkey is bound to recommend Mer-No or Chardon-No-Way to drink with it."

"AAARGGH! Was für ein Abgang!"

...oder gar unbekömmliche Weine zweifelhafter Herkunft weiterzuempfehlen (Fortsetzung):

"Könnte ruhig etwas kräftiger sein."

Wie Sangria gemacht wird

"Ein 2009 Steinmeier Schattenkabinett."

Nur heute beiTrogsitter: SpanischeWeinverkostung!

"We brought in our own wine. Were we supposed to bring our own stems, too?"

"We don't skimp on the pour, sir, we're just generous with the glass."

"It's a 4-hr DVD on the proper way to hold a wine glass - plus a free 2-year subscription to How to Hold A Wine Glass Magazine!"

"They're 'nice', but do you really expect me to drink my imported Merlot out of domestic Merlot glasses?"

Wein ist zwar sexy...

"Und? Wie fandest Du den Abgang?"

In Vino Fertilization

Sex mit Winzern

Bei Frauen hatte Horst den Dreh einfach raus.

"Hast Du'n Weingummi dabei, Schatz?"

"Will you call me?"

"Siehst Du Schatz? Es muss nicht immer französisch sein!"

"You see? I've always told you California wines weren't so bad."

Immer die richtigen Weingläser zur Hand zu haben ist ebenfalls wichtig:

IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS

Depression Glass

"Ich bin noch am Testen."

"Sind diese neuen Diedelgläser denn wirklich 100% kippsicher?"

"Stop, don't open that bottle! According to Wine Minus, it only has 89 Parker-Points!"

"Apparently my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us."

"The nice thing about my wine library is, I can't accidentally leave it on the bus."

...wobei man notfalls natürlich auch jederzeit auf traditionellere Informationsquellen zurückgreifen kann:

"Wine for Left-handed Women from North Phoenix, Who Wear Glasses and Like Cats? Sorry, we only have the Women from South Phoenix version."

"According to the wine critic for the Herald, this is the biggest fucking wine book he's ever seen."

"Like I have the time."

"Nein, das ist für die anderen. Wir hatten die Taschentücher bestellt."

"Chips und Champagner für den Wahlabend?"

"More champagne please!"

"I see what you meant by 'bubbly personality'..."

"When I said bring the bubbly, I didn't mean Alka-Seltzer!"

"I went along with the low lights, the soft music and the little nighties... but there's no way I'm gonna drink champagne out of your shoe!"

"Is that why they call it Cham-pain?"

"Welcome to our protest meeting against hunger and sexism! C'mon, honey, serve the gentleman a glass of Champagne !"

"You'll have to excuse Pat; she hates to see Champagne go to waste."

"They sure don't build those cruise ships like they used to!"

First class only

"...and we're pleased to offer a compli- mentary glass of champagne to those single gentlemen with incomes over $ 250.000 p.a. who leave us their telephone numbers."

"For heavens sake, Mrs. Van Rensselaer, let go!"

Champagne bottles at fifty paces

Doch bei Champagner darf man es natürlich gerne auch mal so richtig knallen lassen...

"I, Dom Perignon, will now uncork the very first bottle of Champagne. Of course I'm just guessing this is the right way to do it."

"Call the attorneys!"

The night they invented Champagne

"A magnum of Champagne! What about me - don't I get one?"

"What I like best about a magnum of Champagne is that it's a controlled portion."

Weiter links!

"This must be your first New Year's with the Mortons - run!"

"First wine tasting, or is this your way of saying the Barolo misses the mark?"

"Honey, I think the 'pick-it-up-in-3-seconds-or-it-has- germs-on-it'-rule just applies to food."

"My husband earned $50,000 last year stomping grapes, but it all went for carpet cleaning."

"The dining room? It's 18 wine bottles long and 15 wide."

CARPETING

...aber man sollte trotzdem versuchen, möglichst immer auf dem Teppich zu bleiben:

"You'll never get that Burgundy stain out, so let's just color the whole thing."

"...and then there's Bob's way of getting a Cotes du Rhone stain out of white carpeting."

Im Zeitalter von Internet und Smartphones gibt es natürlich auch allerlei praktische Online-Hilfen...

"Thanks to Willi Igels' online-wine-tasting-notes, drinking this stuff is a lot more fun!" (just klick on the picture for more information)

"Wine tastes so much better when you have a computer app telling you that it's a good year!"

"Now that's what I call user friendly"

Cheers!

"I trust we'll be able to post a favorable blog about the service this evening."

"No, I'm not a connoisseur, but I do have a website"

"Was lesen wir denn heute Abend Schönes, Martha?"

Weinbibliothek

WINE A - Z

"Yet another wine book 'free of snobbery and pedantry' - as if that's a virtue."